The state that boasts it is "Open for Business" recently made headlines in national and regional newspapers for giving the "business" to its citizens. The laughable folly that is known as West Virginia state government proves once again that it cannot solve even the simplest problem.
In late April, a dead cow floated down the West Fork River and got snagged at the West Milford dam in Harrison County. Had Elsie died a week earlier, when the river was higher, she’d have floated through unnoticed. After a few days in West Milford, however, Elsie began to smell. And that’s when the town of West Milford called for help.
The town found out quickly that no office of state government wanted the job of removing a dead, bloated cow from the West Fork River. Every agency that the town called had its reason for not being able to help.
The Clarksburg Water Board owns the dam. But since the cow was actually stuck on a tree snag upstream of the dam, they weren’t the responsible agency.
The Department of Natural Resources said it was responsible only for wild animals.
The Department of Environmental Protection said the dead cow did not pose an environmental issue and declined to help. (Pray tell. What is an environmental issue?)
Experts proclaimed that the decaying carcass wasn’t a threat to the drinking water of downstream cities. (Translation: We’re adding extra chlorine instead of removing the stinking beast!)
The governor was busy practicing NASCAR flagging, but his aides referred the town to the Department of Agriculture. The Department of Agriculture said that dead cows were a local issue. Apparently, this agency only regulates livestock!
Finally, in desperation, the town called the Treasurer’s Unclaimed Property Division. But they said that the only unclaimed properties they handled were cash, bearer bonds, and fenceable jewelry.
This is West Virginia-the state that shuts down elevators in state-owned office buildings rather than inspect them according to state law. This is West Virginia-the state that financed a movie piracy studio run by state employees in the capitol basement. This is West Virginia-the state where you can embezzle tax dollars at will!
Good grief, West Milford! What did you expect?
Fortunately for West Milford, their volunteer firemen were up to the task. With help from the Nutter Fort VFD, the firemen pulled the dead cow to shore. The Division of Highways (an agency with absolutely no reason to be involved in the matter) then hauled the carcass to the landfill.
The national government is telling us to expect a bird flu pandemic in the near future. The national government has spent millions of homeland security dollars for the protection of drinking water supplies. In spite of the fact that we are facing threats from a natural disaster as well as a terrorist attack, West Virginia is not even up to the task of removing a dead cow from one of its major rivers.
We laugh about a dead cow rotting in a river. Even West Milford’s Fire Chief punned, "Someone had to take the bull by the horns." But our fellow Americans laughed at us all the harder as the cow rotted for three weeks while state leaders passed the buck.
There is a valuable lesson to be learned from this latest fiasco by state government. In the end, it was a group of volunteer firemen who had enough pride in their community to get the job done.
To this end, we all need to volunteer. We need to hold our noses and clean up state government once and for all. Otherwise, we’ll continue to get nothing but "West Virginia excuses" for our tax dollars.
Friday, May 26, 2006
Friday, May 5, 2006
In 1984, Tom Brokaw Smiled At The Telescreen
When he closed the last NBC Evening Newscast of 1984, toothsome Tom Brokaw smiled and told his audience that Orwell’s prediction for 1984 had not happened. Though he never said it, his subliminal message to viewers on that New Year’s Eve was: Party like it’s 1999! And then the peacock did its thing.
In the minds of peacocks and anchormen, Brokaw’s observation was true. In practical terms, Big Brother was already firmly in charge of the American public’s behavior.
George Orwell began writing "1984" in 1947, the same year that commercial television broadcasting began in America. In this classic novel, human behavior is controlled by the telescreen which functions not only as a television but also as an all-seeing camera. Telescreens were located everywhere, and the denizens of Oceania could not escape surveillance.
On this side of the pond, and almost simultaneously with Orwell, Marshall McLuhan offered his concern about the power of television. McLuhan, however, stressed that television need not have camera capability to control the public’s behavior. He predicted that televised images would be so powerful that behavior could be controlled just by programming options.
McLuhan was right. Within a decade, Elvis Presley appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show. Recently, the History Channel selected Elvis’ impact on American youth for one of the episodes in "10 Days That Unexpectedly Changed America." I do find it ironic that the History Channel would say that Elvis Presley’s television appearances "unexpectedly" changed America. Did they not read Orwell or McLuhan?
A week or so ago, my local television newscast ran a story about a man who claimed that his car had been burglarized while parked at a shopping mall. Like Oceania, the mall’s parking lot is saturated with surveillance cameras. The police watched the videotape and determined that no burglary had taken place.
You might be quick to approve of the surveillance cameras in this instance because they solved a case of insurance fraud. But have you given any thought to the fact that the shopping mall is collecting huge volumes of demographic and economic data about its shoppers? It does not take a genius to decipher the tapes and determine when the rich people shop and when the poor people shop or the ratio between the two.
As it stands now, one television ad can persuade one thousand random shoppers to line up at 5 a.m. on Black Friday to vie for 100 computers being sold for $99 each when the store opens at 6 a.m. In the future, the combination of data from surveillance cameras (indoor and out), the data on your personal "store" card, and targeted television ads will have a powerful manipulative effect on each class of shoppers. And the price of goods will change throughout the day and on each weekday to maximize sales to the rich, the poor, the bargain hunters, and the always-desirable impulse buyers. Technology will make it so, but you will only be aware of the targeted ad that persuaded you to shop at a certain time or on a certain day.
Your car’s computer chip might well hold the entire driving history of the vehicle. If your car has a GPS locator, you can be tracked everywhere you go. And if it doesn’t, your cell phone is a beacon. If you were to go on the lam, you’d be tracked by your credit card or ATM swipes. Your credit history is a secret only to you. You have to prove who you are to get a copy of your birth certificate. Will the new border fences hold us in? Or as we are told, keep them out?
Face it: We have fallen a long, long way since we voluntarily gave up our constitutional protection from unreasonable searches at the airport thirty years ago.
It will only get worse, this technological totalitarianism. Today’s grade-schoolers have been conditioned to surveillance cameras, metal detectors, and searches by the K-9 corps. Unlike you and me, they will never know any different life.
If the future depresses you, just remember Tom Brokaw’s smile in 1984 and his reassuring assessment that none of this ever happened. That’s pretty much what Winston Smith did in "1984."
In the minds of peacocks and anchormen, Brokaw’s observation was true. In practical terms, Big Brother was already firmly in charge of the American public’s behavior.
George Orwell began writing "1984" in 1947, the same year that commercial television broadcasting began in America. In this classic novel, human behavior is controlled by the telescreen which functions not only as a television but also as an all-seeing camera. Telescreens were located everywhere, and the denizens of Oceania could not escape surveillance.
On this side of the pond, and almost simultaneously with Orwell, Marshall McLuhan offered his concern about the power of television. McLuhan, however, stressed that television need not have camera capability to control the public’s behavior. He predicted that televised images would be so powerful that behavior could be controlled just by programming options.
McLuhan was right. Within a decade, Elvis Presley appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show. Recently, the History Channel selected Elvis’ impact on American youth for one of the episodes in "10 Days That Unexpectedly Changed America." I do find it ironic that the History Channel would say that Elvis Presley’s television appearances "unexpectedly" changed America. Did they not read Orwell or McLuhan?
A week or so ago, my local television newscast ran a story about a man who claimed that his car had been burglarized while parked at a shopping mall. Like Oceania, the mall’s parking lot is saturated with surveillance cameras. The police watched the videotape and determined that no burglary had taken place.
You might be quick to approve of the surveillance cameras in this instance because they solved a case of insurance fraud. But have you given any thought to the fact that the shopping mall is collecting huge volumes of demographic and economic data about its shoppers? It does not take a genius to decipher the tapes and determine when the rich people shop and when the poor people shop or the ratio between the two.
As it stands now, one television ad can persuade one thousand random shoppers to line up at 5 a.m. on Black Friday to vie for 100 computers being sold for $99 each when the store opens at 6 a.m. In the future, the combination of data from surveillance cameras (indoor and out), the data on your personal "store" card, and targeted television ads will have a powerful manipulative effect on each class of shoppers. And the price of goods will change throughout the day and on each weekday to maximize sales to the rich, the poor, the bargain hunters, and the always-desirable impulse buyers. Technology will make it so, but you will only be aware of the targeted ad that persuaded you to shop at a certain time or on a certain day.
Your car’s computer chip might well hold the entire driving history of the vehicle. If your car has a GPS locator, you can be tracked everywhere you go. And if it doesn’t, your cell phone is a beacon. If you were to go on the lam, you’d be tracked by your credit card or ATM swipes. Your credit history is a secret only to you. You have to prove who you are to get a copy of your birth certificate. Will the new border fences hold us in? Or as we are told, keep them out?
Face it: We have fallen a long, long way since we voluntarily gave up our constitutional protection from unreasonable searches at the airport thirty years ago.
It will only get worse, this technological totalitarianism. Today’s grade-schoolers have been conditioned to surveillance cameras, metal detectors, and searches by the K-9 corps. Unlike you and me, they will never know any different life.
If the future depresses you, just remember Tom Brokaw’s smile in 1984 and his reassuring assessment that none of this ever happened. That’s pretty much what Winston Smith did in "1984."
Friday, April 7, 2006
The U. S. Chamber Should Encourage Clarity
On March 27th, the Institute for Legal Reform issued this press release: West Virginia Rates Last in Legal Fairness. The ILR (a unit of the U. S. Chamber of Commerce) also began running ads showing a man whose mouth is filled with cash. The caption reads: Please Don’t Feed The Trial Lawyers.
I think this ad and the accompanying survey results that formulate the Chamber’s claim about West Virginia’s legal system are disingenuous at best. Big businesses’ cheap shot portraying trial lawyers as money-eaters reminded me of a one-time candidate for Harrison County Sheriff named Raymond Richards who answered a reporter’s accusation by saying, "Pot called Kittle, ‘Blackie!’"
Mr. Richards, one of the dimmer bulbs in the stagelights of political theater, was unsuccessful in his run for sheriff. But his unique way of saying, "The pot called the kettle black." has forever been recorded in my collection of West Virginia euphemisms.
In this matter of a legal fairness survey, the Chamber’s Pot is tarnishing the Trial Lawyers' Kettle.
I could not have arrived at this conclusion without the aid of our state Supreme Court of appeals. For on March 29th, the court (split 3-2 as expected) voted against hearing an appeal of the award of legal fees in a Putnam County case involving a defective car.
A Mr. and Mrs. George purchased their 2000 Dodge Intrepid from Nitro Dodge and later claimed there were problems with the car. To make a long story short, they sued the dealership and the manufacturer, Daimler Chrysler. Upon hearing the case, the jury awarded the couple $6,950 in damages. But that was just a small tip of the iceberg.
The George’s attorneys filed a motion to recover legal fees and submitted their bill of $143,026 to the court. In order to determine the "fairness" of the claim, the judge asked defense counsel to submit its fees for services so that he could make a comparison. If you think $143,026 is exorbitant, then hold on to your hat-Chrysler’s legal bill was actually higher!
My advice to the Chamber of Commerce is twofold. First, quit wasting your money on pseudo-scientific surveys about legal fairness. And second, change the caption of your ad to: Please Don’t Feed The Lawyers-Theirs and Ours.
As for the lawyers involved in this case, I do not fault them for their excessive billable hours. They played by the court’s rules and billed the parties for $300k. If big corporations and insurance companies are stupid enough to wage Pyrrhic wars when a can of STP might have fixed the problem, then so be the outcome.
The members of the jury in this case should be applauded. They decided that the car did have problems but chose not to make the plaintiffs whole by awarding them a new car or a carload of money. They only awarded the repair bill ($4,500) and some money ($2,450) for the George’s aggravation. The jury did its job. And most likely, the jurors felt insulted after listening to five days of courtroom claptrap when they could have been home or at work.
The U. S. Chamber of Commerce wants to make a statement about the high cost of litigation in our nation. They have quoted a 2004 study that estimates the tort system cost $260 billion or $886 per citizen. There is a better way to determine the true and actual cost of litigation as well as a better way to give that number real meaning.
The Chamber should push for a change in accounting rules and seek to have product liability costs and claims included in Cost of Goods Sold instead of being classified as General and Administrative expenses. This change would let Daimler Chrysler shareholders know right away how much the Putnam County litigation has added to the cost of manufacturing each new 2006 Dodge automobile.
When shareholders are given a line item under Cost of Goods Sold that clearly defines product liability litigation costs and product recalls, then management will either respond with better products and better service or the shareholders will change management.
When consumers and shareholders have accurate information, the marketplace will settle the question of legal fairness faster than any other mechanism.
I think this ad and the accompanying survey results that formulate the Chamber’s claim about West Virginia’s legal system are disingenuous at best. Big businesses’ cheap shot portraying trial lawyers as money-eaters reminded me of a one-time candidate for Harrison County Sheriff named Raymond Richards who answered a reporter’s accusation by saying, "Pot called Kittle, ‘Blackie!’"
Mr. Richards, one of the dimmer bulbs in the stagelights of political theater, was unsuccessful in his run for sheriff. But his unique way of saying, "The pot called the kettle black." has forever been recorded in my collection of West Virginia euphemisms.
In this matter of a legal fairness survey, the Chamber’s Pot is tarnishing the Trial Lawyers' Kettle.
I could not have arrived at this conclusion without the aid of our state Supreme Court of appeals. For on March 29th, the court (split 3-2 as expected) voted against hearing an appeal of the award of legal fees in a Putnam County case involving a defective car.
A Mr. and Mrs. George purchased their 2000 Dodge Intrepid from Nitro Dodge and later claimed there were problems with the car. To make a long story short, they sued the dealership and the manufacturer, Daimler Chrysler. Upon hearing the case, the jury awarded the couple $6,950 in damages. But that was just a small tip of the iceberg.
The George’s attorneys filed a motion to recover legal fees and submitted their bill of $143,026 to the court. In order to determine the "fairness" of the claim, the judge asked defense counsel to submit its fees for services so that he could make a comparison. If you think $143,026 is exorbitant, then hold on to your hat-Chrysler’s legal bill was actually higher!
My advice to the Chamber of Commerce is twofold. First, quit wasting your money on pseudo-scientific surveys about legal fairness. And second, change the caption of your ad to: Please Don’t Feed The Lawyers-Theirs and Ours.
As for the lawyers involved in this case, I do not fault them for their excessive billable hours. They played by the court’s rules and billed the parties for $300k. If big corporations and insurance companies are stupid enough to wage Pyrrhic wars when a can of STP might have fixed the problem, then so be the outcome.
The members of the jury in this case should be applauded. They decided that the car did have problems but chose not to make the plaintiffs whole by awarding them a new car or a carload of money. They only awarded the repair bill ($4,500) and some money ($2,450) for the George’s aggravation. The jury did its job. And most likely, the jurors felt insulted after listening to five days of courtroom claptrap when they could have been home or at work.
The U. S. Chamber of Commerce wants to make a statement about the high cost of litigation in our nation. They have quoted a 2004 study that estimates the tort system cost $260 billion or $886 per citizen. There is a better way to determine the true and actual cost of litigation as well as a better way to give that number real meaning.
The Chamber should push for a change in accounting rules and seek to have product liability costs and claims included in Cost of Goods Sold instead of being classified as General and Administrative expenses. This change would let Daimler Chrysler shareholders know right away how much the Putnam County litigation has added to the cost of manufacturing each new 2006 Dodge automobile.
When shareholders are given a line item under Cost of Goods Sold that clearly defines product liability litigation costs and product recalls, then management will either respond with better products and better service or the shareholders will change management.
When consumers and shareholders have accurate information, the marketplace will settle the question of legal fairness faster than any other mechanism.
Friday, March 10, 2006
Road Projects Defy Both Description and Explanation
The year was 1961. President John F. Kennedy rewarded West Virginia for its role in his bid for the White House by drawing a line from Pittsburgh to Charleston and calling it I-79. The road had not been contemplated when America laid out its version of the German Autobahn-the Interstates. But that oversight mattered little. Our stretch of I-79 was a political payback, pure and simple.
My father’s construction company won the contract to build the first section of I-79, essentially the South Fairmont interchange at exit 132. The interchange had already been planned as part of the new US250 bypass. In fact, one of the Tygart’s Valley River bridges had been completed before the groundbreaking for I-79 took place. And what a groundbreaking it was!
Gov. W. W. Barron, U. S. Senator Jennings Randolph, and JFK’s Commerce Secretary, Luther Hodges, were just three of the dignitaries who spoke to a crowd of several hundred. The highlight of the day’s activities was the actual groundbreaking. My father had purchased a new bulldozer for the occasion and the aforementioned dignitaries all took turns at the controls scraping away a few tons of earth. Screw the hand shovels! This was a big deal!
For those of you who live in Fairmont and have wondered for 45 years about the US250 bypass around your town, you now know that it was given up for a higher purpose. For everyone else, this "groundbreaking" vignette provides an informed look at how roads get built in West Virginia. Always remember this: The new king doesn’t have to finish what the old king started. The new king can do as he pleases.
In Morgantown, over a quarter-century has lapsed since an old king started building Route 705. But Route 705 has yet to be linked with I-68. During this interlude, other kings spent money on the Mon-Fayette Expressway. It, too, is unfinished. Morgantown is booming and desperately needs a completed 705 as well as a north bypass highway and a widened Beechurst Avenue in the downtown. How many more kings will it take to finish this patchwork quilt of a road map?
Clarksburg was promised a south bypass (Route 98) by the mid-1980’s. United Hospital Center fronts on that road. But rather than wait for another unfulfilled decade to pass, UHC decided to move out of the city to Jerry Dove Drive-a road that a former king built for the FBI center.
West Virginia has had a long history of changing its road priorities. You can see that history in the old two-lane primary roads. After negotiating miles of curves, you’ll come upon two miles of fairly straight road and then it’s back to the chicanes.
The West Virginia Turnpike best defines our highway metamorphosis-not even Charles Darwin could tell you what it’s supposed to look like when it’s full-grown. The Turnpike began as a two-lane, driver’s survival course but has morphed into a regional tourism commission that operates a flea market for the well-to-do traveler. What’s next? That much-needed horse center? Or the Glade Springs exit?
From my perspective in the northern part of the state, the King Coal Highway and Coalfields Expressway look like payoffs for the glory days of 120 per cent voter turnout. Had these roads been built in the 1950’s or 1960’s, there’s a good argument that they would have spurred regional commerce. Building them now is too little, too late for the coalfields economy and too bad for Jefferson and Berkeley, two growing counties that actually need better roads.
Well, at least our Interstate highways are complete. Unfortunately, the Interstates are designed to move people and goods from one end of the nation to the other. They are not local development highways, regardless of how many businesses locate at the exits.
In this century, West Virginia politicians need to forget about grandiose highway schemes and concentrate on improving the primary highway system. And to entice our future kings and their knaves to pursue that course of action, I recommend using this sure-fire approach-let them ride on the bulldozer at the groundbreaking ceremony.
My father’s construction company won the contract to build the first section of I-79, essentially the South Fairmont interchange at exit 132. The interchange had already been planned as part of the new US250 bypass. In fact, one of the Tygart’s Valley River bridges had been completed before the groundbreaking for I-79 took place. And what a groundbreaking it was!
Gov. W. W. Barron, U. S. Senator Jennings Randolph, and JFK’s Commerce Secretary, Luther Hodges, were just three of the dignitaries who spoke to a crowd of several hundred. The highlight of the day’s activities was the actual groundbreaking. My father had purchased a new bulldozer for the occasion and the aforementioned dignitaries all took turns at the controls scraping away a few tons of earth. Screw the hand shovels! This was a big deal!
For those of you who live in Fairmont and have wondered for 45 years about the US250 bypass around your town, you now know that it was given up for a higher purpose. For everyone else, this "groundbreaking" vignette provides an informed look at how roads get built in West Virginia. Always remember this: The new king doesn’t have to finish what the old king started. The new king can do as he pleases.
In Morgantown, over a quarter-century has lapsed since an old king started building Route 705. But Route 705 has yet to be linked with I-68. During this interlude, other kings spent money on the Mon-Fayette Expressway. It, too, is unfinished. Morgantown is booming and desperately needs a completed 705 as well as a north bypass highway and a widened Beechurst Avenue in the downtown. How many more kings will it take to finish this patchwork quilt of a road map?
Clarksburg was promised a south bypass (Route 98) by the mid-1980’s. United Hospital Center fronts on that road. But rather than wait for another unfulfilled decade to pass, UHC decided to move out of the city to Jerry Dove Drive-a road that a former king built for the FBI center.
West Virginia has had a long history of changing its road priorities. You can see that history in the old two-lane primary roads. After negotiating miles of curves, you’ll come upon two miles of fairly straight road and then it’s back to the chicanes.
The West Virginia Turnpike best defines our highway metamorphosis-not even Charles Darwin could tell you what it’s supposed to look like when it’s full-grown. The Turnpike began as a two-lane, driver’s survival course but has morphed into a regional tourism commission that operates a flea market for the well-to-do traveler. What’s next? That much-needed horse center? Or the Glade Springs exit?
From my perspective in the northern part of the state, the King Coal Highway and Coalfields Expressway look like payoffs for the glory days of 120 per cent voter turnout. Had these roads been built in the 1950’s or 1960’s, there’s a good argument that they would have spurred regional commerce. Building them now is too little, too late for the coalfields economy and too bad for Jefferson and Berkeley, two growing counties that actually need better roads.
Well, at least our Interstate highways are complete. Unfortunately, the Interstates are designed to move people and goods from one end of the nation to the other. They are not local development highways, regardless of how many businesses locate at the exits.
In this century, West Virginia politicians need to forget about grandiose highway schemes and concentrate on improving the primary highway system. And to entice our future kings and their knaves to pursue that course of action, I recommend using this sure-fire approach-let them ride on the bulldozer at the groundbreaking ceremony.
Friday, February 3, 2006
A January Warm Enough To Ripen Watermelons
When the temperature is warmer than normal, my thoughts usually turn to Al Gore and global warming. I have this indelible vision of Al Gore as a bean-eating cowboy in the "campfire" scene in Mel Brook’s "Blazing Saddles." For that matter, I always think of the "schnitzengruber" scene from that same movie whenever Bill Clinton’s name pops up. January was downright balmy so you can imagine where my mind has been.
If you live in Beckley, however, your mind hasn’t been on January’s warm weather. No, you’ve been thinking about the "Governor Lepetomane Toll Road" scene from "Blazing Saddles."
What struck me as so odd last month were not the warm temperatures but the incredibly ripe watermelons at the supermarket. It’s just wrong to shop for ripe watermelon in mid-January. Or at least it once was.
It hasn’t been that long ago that even the most exclusive restaurants had to limit their fresh fruit offerings to whatever was "in season." Whether you were dining at the Greenbrier or the Four Seasons mattered not-their menus clearly announced that seasonal disclaimer. Then it was left to your waiter to announce the fruit du jour.
Eating watermelon in January in West Virginia tells us a great deal about the choices available to us in the 21st Century. We have come a long way in the 700 years since Marco Polo first delivered peppercorns to exclusive French restaurants. But both events are the result of the exact same system-the marketplace. The marketplace has always been defined by supply, demand, and the consumer’s choice based on price, quality, and availability. While these are tangible choices, a great intangible factor (The customer is always right!) has long been the force that drives the gears of the system.
In many respects, there is merit to the paucity of the old ways. In olden times, it was the custom in some villages to give each child an orange at Christmas. That doesn’t sound like much of a gift in our time. But if you had been dining on dried beans and salt pork for two months, a sweet orange would have been a real treat. I dare say that a child of yore had more fond memories of eating a single orange in winter than modern kids have of ubiquitous X-boxes.
When we were a society that dined "in season", we had a greater appreciation for nature, the seasons, and the bounty of our garden crops. We began each meal with a blessing and we properly thanked God for putting food on our table. Today, it is disingenuous to say a blessing when the table has been prepared by Pizza Hut, KFC, Taco Bell, or Long John Silver.
Having choices, on the other hand, doesn’t mean that we have become blasphemers hell-bent on scrapping our old social values. That’s the beauty of an economy that allows the consumer to have choices. All that is different now is that practicing the old values has now become a choice whereas before, it wasn’t.
Let’s call it the Wal-Mart phenomenon. We talk endlessly about preserving our old downtown retail districts. We wax eloquently about the family-owned stores that once graced Main Street. We lament that the big box stores along the interstate have completely rearranged the retail district. And who can forget Blue Laws and restful Sundays?
Fifty years ago, we did not wax eloquent about parking meters. We also carped that Smith’s Bicycle Shop had no competition and that they sold Schwinn bikes for an arm and a leg above wholesale. We also complained about Blue Laws. Just because the shopkeepers needed a day off shouldn’t have resulted in laws punishing the rest of us.
Consumers want choices-the more the better. That’s why Marco Polo appears in the history books. That’s why some folks prefer the Martha Stewart stuff at Kmart to the same kind of stuff at Target. In olden times, soup was a necessity, invented as a way to eat precious leftovers. Today, you can fill your pantry with canned soups of each and every kind, with or without salt added.
The Luddites of our age sincerely believe that, by encumbering Wal-Mart with "Blue Laws", they can turn the clocks back to 1950. But that is not going to happen. F. A. Hayek demonstrated correctly, and well before 1950, that consumers are the force that defines the marketplace.
Al Gore’s flatulence notwithstanding, that’s why watermelon was "in season" last month.
If you live in Beckley, however, your mind hasn’t been on January’s warm weather. No, you’ve been thinking about the "Governor Lepetomane Toll Road" scene from "Blazing Saddles."
What struck me as so odd last month were not the warm temperatures but the incredibly ripe watermelons at the supermarket. It’s just wrong to shop for ripe watermelon in mid-January. Or at least it once was.
It hasn’t been that long ago that even the most exclusive restaurants had to limit their fresh fruit offerings to whatever was "in season." Whether you were dining at the Greenbrier or the Four Seasons mattered not-their menus clearly announced that seasonal disclaimer. Then it was left to your waiter to announce the fruit du jour.
Eating watermelon in January in West Virginia tells us a great deal about the choices available to us in the 21st Century. We have come a long way in the 700 years since Marco Polo first delivered peppercorns to exclusive French restaurants. But both events are the result of the exact same system-the marketplace. The marketplace has always been defined by supply, demand, and the consumer’s choice based on price, quality, and availability. While these are tangible choices, a great intangible factor (The customer is always right!) has long been the force that drives the gears of the system.
In many respects, there is merit to the paucity of the old ways. In olden times, it was the custom in some villages to give each child an orange at Christmas. That doesn’t sound like much of a gift in our time. But if you had been dining on dried beans and salt pork for two months, a sweet orange would have been a real treat. I dare say that a child of yore had more fond memories of eating a single orange in winter than modern kids have of ubiquitous X-boxes.
When we were a society that dined "in season", we had a greater appreciation for nature, the seasons, and the bounty of our garden crops. We began each meal with a blessing and we properly thanked God for putting food on our table. Today, it is disingenuous to say a blessing when the table has been prepared by Pizza Hut, KFC, Taco Bell, or Long John Silver.
Having choices, on the other hand, doesn’t mean that we have become blasphemers hell-bent on scrapping our old social values. That’s the beauty of an economy that allows the consumer to have choices. All that is different now is that practicing the old values has now become a choice whereas before, it wasn’t.
Let’s call it the Wal-Mart phenomenon. We talk endlessly about preserving our old downtown retail districts. We wax eloquently about the family-owned stores that once graced Main Street. We lament that the big box stores along the interstate have completely rearranged the retail district. And who can forget Blue Laws and restful Sundays?
Fifty years ago, we did not wax eloquent about parking meters. We also carped that Smith’s Bicycle Shop had no competition and that they sold Schwinn bikes for an arm and a leg above wholesale. We also complained about Blue Laws. Just because the shopkeepers needed a day off shouldn’t have resulted in laws punishing the rest of us.
Consumers want choices-the more the better. That’s why Marco Polo appears in the history books. That’s why some folks prefer the Martha Stewart stuff at Kmart to the same kind of stuff at Target. In olden times, soup was a necessity, invented as a way to eat precious leftovers. Today, you can fill your pantry with canned soups of each and every kind, with or without salt added.
The Luddites of our age sincerely believe that, by encumbering Wal-Mart with "Blue Laws", they can turn the clocks back to 1950. But that is not going to happen. F. A. Hayek demonstrated correctly, and well before 1950, that consumers are the force that defines the marketplace.
Al Gore’s flatulence notwithstanding, that’s why watermelon was "in season" last month.
Friday, January 13, 2006
We Needn't Accept Mediocre Education in West Virginia
The foundation stones of our public education system are wobbly bricks, not boulders of substance. It was designed in such a manner by Count Bismark in order to churn out common denominators to staff the factories (and armies) of the industrial age. And here we are, a century and a quarter later, still churning out common denominators as if big mills dominate the landscape.
The education bureaucracy has avoided changing this ancient formula that generates common denominators because modern standardized tests have been tweaked to mathematically prove that most students test "above average." Why should the bureaucrats change the system when they can fudge the test results? The parents, more than anybody, are happy with the outcomes.
Parents hate to spend their evenings going over homework with their kids when they’d rather watch reality programming on television. ("My Name Is Earl" can be considered in this genre.) Parents love the fact that their kids are almost guaranteed to graduate from high school. Parents are thrilled when their sons and daughters are bestowed with "honor student" bumper stickers. Parents cherish the PROMISE scholarship for students with grade-inflated B averages.
You’ve read in your local newspaper that one-third or more of high school students are not only on the honor roll, but one-third of that group has a 4.0 average. You have also read in your local newspaper that high school graduating classes now typically have multiple valedictorians. Six valedictorians are not uncommon and a dozen or more is no longer rare.
This has gotten out of hand, but there is a solution.
Across the state, we have a cadre of outstanding teachers. Perhaps the best algebra teacher is in Mason County. Perhaps the best English literature teacher is in Berkeley County. And so on. Why not let these peer-reviewed, outstanding teachers teach every student in West Virginia high schools? Technology can make it happen.
In this day and age, Mr. Jones could stand before a camera in Point Pleasant at 9 a.m. and broadcast his algebra class to every high school in West Virginia. Ms. Smith could then go on at 10 a.m. to broadcast her views on "Great Expectations" from Martinsburg. Every hour, your sons and daughters would receive instruction from the best teachers available. This method of teaching would outshine even that of the most exclusive prep schools.
For my great expectation to work, barriers would have to be demolished. First and foremost, the teachers' unions would have to admit that most teachers are mediocre and then convince mediocre teachers that they would be better off as highly-paid classroom monitors and teachers' aides.
The second, and even more difficult task, would be getting the parents on board. Parents understand that Ms. Smith would have great expectations of her students when they took the exam on "Great Expectations." No longer would a last-minute read of "Cliffs Notes" on the internet suffice for an A or B grade. Little Johnny might not be so learnéd in Ms. Smith’s class!
When one out of eight (12%) high school students make the honor roll, then you know that the system is doing its job of not only raising standards but also of weeding out the students who are not college material. When one out of three students make the honor roll, then you can appreciate why colleges and universities struggle to graduate half or fewer of their matriculating classes.
There is one other aspect to my high-tech classroom of the air that merits consideration. If done right, snow days would be a thing of the past. Broadband can bring the classroom of the air to every house via satellite, DSL, or cable. And don’t tell me that there are households that cannot afford broadband. For decades, the satellite dish has been known as West Virginia’s state tree.
An education is not something you should ever sell out for. When you do earn an "A", your first question should be "Why wasn’t the class harder?" Yet under our education system, we have embraced low expectations and rewarded ourselves handsomely with Ozian certificates for successfully guessing answers from multiple-choice lists.
The day is coming when China, Japan, and India challenge our position as world leader. Asian parents have long understood that their children’s education is the way to success. Unlike Americans, they could care less about bumper stickers.
We have given government a monopoly on public education. That doesn’t mean we should accept mediocrity and an archaic system of teaching.
The education bureaucracy has avoided changing this ancient formula that generates common denominators because modern standardized tests have been tweaked to mathematically prove that most students test "above average." Why should the bureaucrats change the system when they can fudge the test results? The parents, more than anybody, are happy with the outcomes.
Parents hate to spend their evenings going over homework with their kids when they’d rather watch reality programming on television. ("My Name Is Earl" can be considered in this genre.) Parents love the fact that their kids are almost guaranteed to graduate from high school. Parents are thrilled when their sons and daughters are bestowed with "honor student" bumper stickers. Parents cherish the PROMISE scholarship for students with grade-inflated B averages.
You’ve read in your local newspaper that one-third or more of high school students are not only on the honor roll, but one-third of that group has a 4.0 average. You have also read in your local newspaper that high school graduating classes now typically have multiple valedictorians. Six valedictorians are not uncommon and a dozen or more is no longer rare.
This has gotten out of hand, but there is a solution.
Across the state, we have a cadre of outstanding teachers. Perhaps the best algebra teacher is in Mason County. Perhaps the best English literature teacher is in Berkeley County. And so on. Why not let these peer-reviewed, outstanding teachers teach every student in West Virginia high schools? Technology can make it happen.
In this day and age, Mr. Jones could stand before a camera in Point Pleasant at 9 a.m. and broadcast his algebra class to every high school in West Virginia. Ms. Smith could then go on at 10 a.m. to broadcast her views on "Great Expectations" from Martinsburg. Every hour, your sons and daughters would receive instruction from the best teachers available. This method of teaching would outshine even that of the most exclusive prep schools.
For my great expectation to work, barriers would have to be demolished. First and foremost, the teachers' unions would have to admit that most teachers are mediocre and then convince mediocre teachers that they would be better off as highly-paid classroom monitors and teachers' aides.
The second, and even more difficult task, would be getting the parents on board. Parents understand that Ms. Smith would have great expectations of her students when they took the exam on "Great Expectations." No longer would a last-minute read of "Cliffs Notes" on the internet suffice for an A or B grade. Little Johnny might not be so learnéd in Ms. Smith’s class!
When one out of eight (12%) high school students make the honor roll, then you know that the system is doing its job of not only raising standards but also of weeding out the students who are not college material. When one out of three students make the honor roll, then you can appreciate why colleges and universities struggle to graduate half or fewer of their matriculating classes.
There is one other aspect to my high-tech classroom of the air that merits consideration. If done right, snow days would be a thing of the past. Broadband can bring the classroom of the air to every house via satellite, DSL, or cable. And don’t tell me that there are households that cannot afford broadband. For decades, the satellite dish has been known as West Virginia’s state tree.
An education is not something you should ever sell out for. When you do earn an "A", your first question should be "Why wasn’t the class harder?" Yet under our education system, we have embraced low expectations and rewarded ourselves handsomely with Ozian certificates for successfully guessing answers from multiple-choice lists.
The day is coming when China, Japan, and India challenge our position as world leader. Asian parents have long understood that their children’s education is the way to success. Unlike Americans, they could care less about bumper stickers.
We have given government a monopoly on public education. That doesn’t mean we should accept mediocrity and an archaic system of teaching.
Friday, December 30, 2005
It's Time for a New Year!
After several years of intensive research, I have finally completed my genealogy study. It has been an amazing experience in learning who my ancestors were. Some were notable, most were just regular folks, and a few obviously were scoundrels. I thought I’d pass along biographical sketches of a few of the more interesting ancestors in my family tree.
ADMIRAL BEAUREGARD PIERRE LAROQUEFORT:
The Admiral is my only known ancestor of French origin. He was declared a hero during the Battle of New Orleans by Andrew Jackson. During the battle, Captain LaRoquefort sailed into New Orleans with a hold full of bananas. His ship was a month late arriving at port and the bananas had ripened to a rich brown color. But all was not lost as he directed his crew to spread the bananas on the streets of the French Quarter, thus causing the British soldiers to slip and fall during their advance. Jackson awarded a field promotion to Admiral for my great-great-grandfather LaRoquefort.
Based on further research, I also learned that France built the Maginot Line along the arc of a banana to honor the exploits of Admiral LaRoquefort.
RUGBY QUILP D’URBERVILLE:
He was an itinerant cobbler from Exmoor in Devonshire. He arrived at Boston in 1693 claiming to be the sole heir of Lord Bartelby Pecksniff D’Urberville, Twelfth Earl of Exmoor. It turned out that he was the illegitimate son of Lord Bartleby and Miss Tess Mountoffen. She worked in the Lord’s castle as a pastry maker and was renowned for her meat pie concoctions.
"R. Q.", as he was known in Massachusetts Bay Colony court records, convinced many Boston merchants that he was the scion of royalty and ran up quite a tab before being sentenced to Debtor’s Prison in London. Before leaving Boston, he had managed to impregnate my great-great-great-grandmother, Dorcas Micawber.
GEORGE WASHINGTON ALLEN:
First of my ancestors to settle in what is now West Virginia, he served in the Revolution and was given land in lieu of wages for military service. As was the custom in that age, he was required to clear the land and plant corn to prove his homestead claim. He then turned his interests to distilling his crop which allowed him to increase his landholdings. He married Peg(gotty) M’Choakumchild and they had thirteen children that lived to adulthood.
EDGAR ALLAN ALLEN:
A fourth cousin, I include him because of his literary skills. He went west in the 1870’s and wrote famous short stories such as: The Mule of the Baskervilles, A Tale of Three Cities, The Casket of Lemonjello, and The Pit and the Metronome. For two decades, Edgar Allen was a newspaper reporter and wrote obituaries for the Tombstone Gazette.
Here’s hoping that your 2005 helped you find your roots.
ADMIRAL BEAUREGARD PIERRE LAROQUEFORT:
The Admiral is my only known ancestor of French origin. He was declared a hero during the Battle of New Orleans by Andrew Jackson. During the battle, Captain LaRoquefort sailed into New Orleans with a hold full of bananas. His ship was a month late arriving at port and the bananas had ripened to a rich brown color. But all was not lost as he directed his crew to spread the bananas on the streets of the French Quarter, thus causing the British soldiers to slip and fall during their advance. Jackson awarded a field promotion to Admiral for my great-great-grandfather LaRoquefort.
Based on further research, I also learned that France built the Maginot Line along the arc of a banana to honor the exploits of Admiral LaRoquefort.
RUGBY QUILP D’URBERVILLE:
He was an itinerant cobbler from Exmoor in Devonshire. He arrived at Boston in 1693 claiming to be the sole heir of Lord Bartelby Pecksniff D’Urberville, Twelfth Earl of Exmoor. It turned out that he was the illegitimate son of Lord Bartleby and Miss Tess Mountoffen. She worked in the Lord’s castle as a pastry maker and was renowned for her meat pie concoctions.
"R. Q.", as he was known in Massachusetts Bay Colony court records, convinced many Boston merchants that he was the scion of royalty and ran up quite a tab before being sentenced to Debtor’s Prison in London. Before leaving Boston, he had managed to impregnate my great-great-great-grandmother, Dorcas Micawber.
GEORGE WASHINGTON ALLEN:
First of my ancestors to settle in what is now West Virginia, he served in the Revolution and was given land in lieu of wages for military service. As was the custom in that age, he was required to clear the land and plant corn to prove his homestead claim. He then turned his interests to distilling his crop which allowed him to increase his landholdings. He married Peg(gotty) M’Choakumchild and they had thirteen children that lived to adulthood.
EDGAR ALLAN ALLEN:
A fourth cousin, I include him because of his literary skills. He went west in the 1870’s and wrote famous short stories such as: The Mule of the Baskervilles, A Tale of Three Cities, The Casket of Lemonjello, and The Pit and the Metronome. For two decades, Edgar Allen was a newspaper reporter and wrote obituaries for the Tombstone Gazette.
Here’s hoping that your 2005 helped you find your roots.
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